the ride of a narcissist
I attempted to find new love after I lost you and it worked as well as you would have expected. It was rough, a roller coaster I couldn't stop myself from riding over and over again no matter how much it left me sore in the morning. my soul came alive and burned a flame bigger than I imagined and the adrenaline shot through my veins quicker than any injection high could have given and I went back, first in line, every time, and I pulled the bar tighter and tighter to hold on to it knowing it would hurt me later on, smelling the rust on my hands from the firmness of my grip, and how disappointed you would be to know I kept riding that ride knowing I was aware of the pain and realizing I let someone treat me that way after how much you loved me.